Video Reveals Possible “Second Thrower” at St. Paddy’s Parade

When Hwy. 30a’s St. Patrick’s Day parade was disrupted by protesters Saturday, authorities quickly announced an arrest and closed their investigation into the matter.

“We are confident,” a WCSO press release later stated, “that the person in custody acted on his own, was not part of a larger conspiracy and is the lone thrower.”

Now, however, 30aScene has been given evidence to indicate that there was a second bead thrower at the parade’s end, quite possibly all the way over by the Gulfplace square, commonly known as “that grassy place.”

A drunken student here for Spring Break, who mistakenly thought he had gone all the way to New Orleans for Mardi Gras when he saw the parade, happened to video the incident and, after a thorough examination with his frat buddies at the Red Bar, concluded the parade’s grand marshal, talk radio host Burnie Thompson, was struck by multiple beads from two different directions.

“I didn’t think the video was all that clear at first,” the student said, but a friend of mine who’s majoring in Computer Science put it on a loop with some amusing captions.  After watching it over and over with some jello-shooters, it finally became obvious.”

GiantNot everyone agreed however.

“That grassy place is a couple hundred yards from the intersection, with buildings in the way,” a law enforcement spokesperson said.  “A person would have to be ten-feet tall to make that throw.”  When asked if a ten-foot tall thrower could be conclusively ruled out, however, the spokesperson declined comment, instead rolling his eyes and suggesting we “sober up.”

We at 30aScene are reserving judgment on the authenticity of the video until it’s owner brings us the jello-shooters he promised.  Nevertheless, in the interests of the public good and because we couldn’t find anything else to write about today, we are posting it here to allow you—the public—to decide for yourselves.

Check out the video below (turn your speakers on) and let us know what you think.  Does the tape tell the tale?


Author: Ripple Van Buren

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